I have a disease, or a syndrome, or…I don’t really know what to call it. “I’ve got this thing called Ehlers Danlos Syndrome,” is what I usually mumble to people when they ask what’s wrong with me. Otherwise it tends to go unmentioned. Partly because I don’t want to be seen to be whining, and partly because when I do mention it people dismiss it as something that isn’t that serious because, I suppose, they don’t understand it. I barely understand it myself after years of living it, so how am I meant to explain it to anyone else?
As a child, I think I always loved food a little too much. I depended on it to bring me joy. I hoped it would make me happy. I would think about it constantly and had to eat everything I craved. Any food I saw, I just had to have.
Being nice to myself is one of the most difficult things for me to do. My automatic mind is to ridicule myself until I get it “right.” But, my past anorexia, binge eating disorder, body dysmorphia and bulimia have always resulted in the complete opposite.
I have been chronically ill for over seven years, and had chronic pain for four. Living in this state, exercise is not easy, I’m only 24 years old and close to diabetes. But no excuses, it’s time to take care of myself.
The first step in getting into the exercise habit is to find your reason, your main motive. Whether it’s for you to fit into that amazing dress, to be healthier, for your kids or partner, anything! If downloading “Pokemon Go” or another game will help to make getting out and about fun, do that! My reason is for my self-esteem, confidence, and my future.
When you stop and think about it, the human species is the ultimate variety pack. We embody a collection of physical features in a staggering array of combinations. In all their diverse glory, though, most people are dissatisfied with at least one of their features. Some want a smaller nose or a flatter stomach. Others want to be taller or to have bigger muscles. Some yearn for thick, luscious hair, while others dream of a movie star smile. Despite these insecurities, people generally go on living their lives.